Honk if you hate deers

On the way home from seeing Rico and chasing him while Mum was riding him, it was dark and scary and then Mum slowed down and did something she's never done with me in the car - she did something and the car made a NOISE! It was COOL. She said it was called the horn. And then she put the bright lights on and I saw IT -

A deer, complete with beady eyes and suicidal tendancies. So I barked and barked and barked and told it to stay the heck out of the way and away from me and my mum.

And mum kept using the horn thingy. It was cool.

Anyway, I'm sorta in trouble. Yesterday, while mum was in the shower I did something that made her mad. I can't be blamed if the stuff smelled interesting. Its my JOB to identify and if necessary taste these things. It was HER FAULT she left it out with out supervising me.

But mum said my punishment was to have the pictures of "the destruction" posted on my blog. As if that would make my fans love me any less. Ha.
But here they are:



Mum inserts: Yes, that's a Likamaid candy packet. I'm only allowed that stuff once every blue moon and I had left it on the coffee table. I THOUGHT it was safe, but apparently not. B-dawg had gotten better at being a destructo-dawg, but I guess I took too long in the shower. I love how he had to open EACH flavor and BOTH sticks. And spread it all over my ottoman. Lovely. Thank god for dirt devil dust busters.

Anyway, here I am, watching her put the "proof" on the internets. No, I am not happy. But Mum is quick to forgive, so I'm sure I'll be getting a peice of her pizza crust before its much later. hee hee.

And I thought my hair cut stunk...

Mum spent two whole evenings clipping 'Rico. And today, she did it some more! Poor dude. I am so glad that I'm small enough to get clipped inside, at least. Rico was not happy, but he prefers the outside to the inside clipping.

Rico and I are pals. We get along really really well. I like to lick his nose and he lets me hang out in his stall with him.


Not only that, we share hay. He eats it, and I sniff it, looking for the mouses I think probably lived in it. Because we all know that cats are slackers and that barn cat, Barley (not my sister) looks awful skinny for a barn cat. It makes me think she's been slacking.


Anyway, so thats what we did today. And now I'm sleeping. Tomorrow is Friday and mum says its shower day for me. I think getting shaved should mean more time between the showers. argh. oh well. maybe she'll forget. Peace, love and kibble, my homies!

I've been a good boy

Can I have some, Mum? Everyone else likes to give me people food. I am pretty sure that every people food is better than the best dog food.

I mean, I know its just pasta and bread, but pleeeeeeese?

By the way, I had lots of fun at the barn today, even though I had to wear my coat and it was WARM!!! If you hadn't shaved me, I would have been fine.

I'm just saying.

I hate mum

Doesn't she know its supposed to be 25 degrees tonight???? ARRRGGGH!

pictures from the best weekend.

Prez Laura and Em-me were here. It was AWESOME. Prez Laura fed me eggs and bacon. Sweet!
Here are some pics from the weekend! I miss you guys ( mum inserts: ME TOO!) Come back and stay at Casa Baxter any time!
love
the B-Dawg


This is me and Prez Laura. Notice the way she lets me chill on her shoulders. I love her.


Em-me has the best scratches EVER. No wonder Tinkerbell slept with her the whole weekend.


I love Em-me too. B-kisses are good luck - she scored SUPER high on her math competition after kissin' Baxter dawg.


It was a busy weekend. I needed my sleep.

Dear Em-me

Please don't despair. I haven't forgotten about you or Prez Laura and the fabulous weekend we had together. It was magic, it was wonderful, it was as good as the fried eggs and bacon that we shared.

Mum has been SUPER crazy and hasn't uploaded our photos. We have been spending the last two nights FOREVER at the barn while she shaved Jericho (poor sucker.) And when we get home, she's all about the shower and the bed.

I've been NAGGING her to upload the photos of the hotness that is you and me, but she's not been listening. Mums - you know how they are. I know you do, because I saw it all this weekend.

I promise to bite mum soon if she doesn't put our pictures up.
hugs, kisses, and bacon
B-Dawg

Mum does't like my dreads...

She calls them mats. And she forced me to lay down while she went to mad, crazy work with the scissors. I thought she LIKED a hairy chest, but apparently not.

I kept trying to tell her it was a style I saw on a dog show. See, I really liked this breed in the Herding group called a Puli. It is the coolest looking dog (except for Baxter dawgs, of course) - he comes born with built in camo - perfect for chilling with some sheep.

I've always wanted to chill with sheep. Not deers, though - which were back last night, by the way, and they brought reinforcements. There were easily eleventy hundred in the neighborhood. But I took care of them. It was cold thought, without my dreadlocks.

Anyway, Mum says I am not a herding dog, and I am certainly not a Puli or a Rastafarian (what ever that is). And since she keeps finding dreads on me, she told me its going to be time for a clip... maybe even this weekend.

Its February, people. Its like not even above freezing most of the time. B-dawgs are not supposed to get clipped in WINTER.

Maybe Prez Laura and Cousin Em-me (who will be staying at B-dawgs casa this weekend) can distract her long enough to put it off. That might give me time to grow better looking dreads and change her mind.

Have a Baxter-liscious Weekend, my Homies!

Do you speak Baxter?

I actually sing with mum when she's not videoing me.
BUt do you understand what I'm saying? Mum does

She works hard for the money...

Mum had to work on Saturday AGAIN. And this time it was twice as long. She didn't get home until after 11 PM. And where was I? In my crates! The horrible horrible confinement. Sure, she's put two super big crates together and filled it with food, water, toys, a bed, and a pee pad. And maybe it isn't that bad, but I can't run free, like a Baxter Dawg should.

So when she got home, she told me she was sorry (quite right!) and said I could play all night if I wanted to - just don't wake her up.

So I did - I put all my toys all over the house on the floor and had a ball.
But it made me really tired on Sunday. So when she took her nightly shower, I went ahead and went to bed. First on the bed gets to pick their spot. OR at least thats what the cats say when I jump on the bed and see them chillin in my spot.


cats. i just don't get them.

Inside scoop on the life of the B-dawg

Since so many of my fans have asked for more info on my life, I filled out a little questionaire that mum got when she got tagged in email. I thought it was fun. Feel free to ask me any more questions that you like!

Hugs,
Baxter
Fan Club Alphabet:
[A is for age]: 18 months… a canine teenager
[B is for beer of choice]: I’m a wine drinker, actually, when mum isn't looking.
[C is for career]: Cutest B-Dawg In The World
[D is for favorite Drink]: What ever mum has got, ‘cept hot tea
[E is for Essential item you use everyday]: A chewy. Gotta work the jaws, man.
[F is for Favorite song at the moment]: “Who let the dogs out?” (what?)
[G is for favorite Game]: Booga – where I chase mum and she chases me!
[H is for Home town]: Alabama – Doublecreek Kennel
[I is for Instruments you play]: I sing, man.
[J is for favorite Juice]: not big on the juice. Unless its from steak. I like steak juice.
[K is for Kids]: One word: neutered.
[L is for last kiss]: Mum – this AM
[M is for marriage]: Nah, I like to play the field. Lots of girls dig the B-love.
[N is for full Name]: Baxter Baxter Baxter (three times FAST)
[O is for Overnight hosp stays]: one – for That Horrible Operation
[P is for phobias]: Big dogs who play rough.
[Q is for quote]: “Do you want fries with that?” Heck yeah, mum.
[R is for biggest Regret]: Agreeing to get in the car that day we went to the vets office
[S is for sports]: I like fetch, and chase, and tag!
[T is for Time you wake up]: 5 AM!!!
[U is for color underwear]: I go nekkid, ‘cept when its cold
[V is for Vegetable you love]: Am a meat eater. Veggies yuck. Wait, are fries veggies?
[W is for Worst Habit]: Mum says “chewing on shoes”
[X is for X-rays you've had]: none.
[Y is for Yummy food you make]: Why would I cook when people like to cook for me?
[Z is for zodiac sign]: Virgo, baby

I have recovered!

This was me, convalescening. Mum waited on me hand and foot. Life was good as a sick puppy. But she's sick now with her cold. I hope she's not counting on me to wait on her... but I will bring her what ever toys I have if she wants.

I know lots of people words. I know more people words than mum knows B'dawg barks. One of my favorite is "Treat." Or "Crate" because Mum givees me these liver snacks that are TAY-STEEE!

I know some tricks, as mum calls them. I call them compromises. I do stupid things, mum gives me TREATS! Like "Bark" which I know really well. I also know "Sit" and "Lay Down" which, if you ask me, are pretty useless. I'm learning "Roll Over" but I stop half way so mum can scratch my belly. And "Dance" which is one of my favorite. B'dawgs know how to jam.

I've just learned "bell." Mum is training me to go to the door and pull on the bell there, instead of just sitting in front of it, staring at her. She's a little slow, you know. Sometimes it is hard to get her attention - hence the noise as well as me staring at her.

Anyway, I'm real good at "Toy." That's a good one - that means mum is FinALLY ready to play. But more specifically, I know "Ball" which is my little yellow tennis ball - I am one smart dawg - I knew how to fetch as soon as mum got me home. Its one of my favorite games. The yellow ball bounces and mum is always willing to throw it. After about three or four times, its MY turn to play a game - my game with her is called, "bring the ball back to mom but don't let her have it." That's an awesome game. I put it between my feet and then growl at her to try to take it. She's not near as fast as me....

Mum says its time for bed now. She snores when she's got the sniffles. Good thing I can sleep while she's at work.

I hab da sniffles...

Da B-dawg is sick. I keep sneezin and snifflin and mby nose ib runnin.

anb mum hab to work on saturbay. sucks.

(sniff)

goin to go and take a nab.

AAAAAA CHHHHOOOOBOOO.

I am so fabulous

One more - because you can never get too much of the B.

Did you miss me?

Its been a busy time for the B-daw. Mum had a birthday, and she got a new car. I spent the weekend with some of the best peeps ever - let me tell you, i thought Saturday morning started OK when mum shared a little of her wheat bagel and cream cheese, but OH! Was I wrong!!! Mister V and his wife were all about sharing cheese eggs with the B-dawg. I even helped do the morning dishes. Then mum dropped me off at Mrs V's mum's house. She's all old and spunky, so I was all about hanging out with her all day! She and I would sit and watch TV and she fed me CHICKEN FINGERS!!!! EXCELLENT!!!

And then, sunday morning - I got to have balongna and FRENCH TOAST AND BACON!!!!!! I was living the life, man. I was most disappointed to leave the V's house. They are the best Baxter family ever. And Mister V loves to spoil the B-dawg.

There were some other dogs and stuff, but I intimidated them enough, and hey, I am the cutest dog in the world, so I didn't have to share too much.

So it was an excellent weekend.
I got this groovy coat from the Gucci dog's family - apparently she's too big for it, but it fits me JUST fine. I like it. I feel like I'm stylin' when I wear it.




All in all, life is good for the B-dawg. Hope you all stay warm this week - its too cold for me to do much of anything but snuggle with mum.

The Deers Are BACK

Last night, when mum took me out at about 6:30 to potty, I spotted them - AND THEY WERE CLOSE! There were SIX of them, right at the end of my driveway!!! (Mum inserts: In the yard across the street) OK, but still, they were so close I could see their beedy little eyes - AND I BARKED AND BARKED AND I would have attacked and protected my mum and my neighborhood, but mum kept hold of the leash.

I was so fierce that they split in all directions - two one way, three another and then one off in another direction. And boy were they scared!!!

The rest of the night I kept vigilance at the front door, barking just incase they thought it was safe. Stupid deers. They should know by now, This is Baxter's home.

ATTN: Now holding auditions for a new Mum

Thats it - it was bad enough when she tried to cut off a toe while she was clipping my nails (which were perfectly fine being 12 inches long, thankyouvermuch) but last week, she was "grooming" me with scissors. And I was curious. How could those things make the fur fall off. Then she got on the phone with Em-me while she was doing this. And I saw my chance to examine the scissors - with my tongue, of course - like every good dog would.

And it bled - into my whiskers and it made me constantly want to lick something, including mum, her clothes, her hand and her furniture. She felt bad, supposedly, but it wasn't HER tongue with the ow-ie. She made it up to me though, she fed me a popsicle. Which was orange, her least favorite flavor. I think it was a peace offering, and it did make the tongue stop bleeding. She was nice enough to hold it for me and make sure I licked the best spot and didn't drip anywhere. So I had ALMOST forgiven her for letting me have access to the Evil Scissor Things.

But then she decided I had too much blood on my face. (Hello, It was YOUR fault, Mum - I don't see why *I* got punished for it) so it was in the shower I went.

This is how showers for the B-dawg go:

Mum and I get into the bathroom. Mum shuts door. Mum turns on water. I realize its too late and I lay down and show her my tummy for one last scritch before getting shampooed. Mum carries me into shower stall. Mum washes her face. Mum then suds me up withe funky smelling, flea killing shampoo. Keep in mind I'm a tiny dawg, ya'll. She uses like HALF A BOTTLE of the stuff. And then the fleas get all pissy at me and start crawling and bitting and its most uncomfortable, not to mention the soap in my eyes and its cold there on the bottom of the shower, not getting any of the warm water while mum stinks herself up with her own soaps. Finally, she picks me up for a rinse. This is when she picks off all the eye booger gunk on my nose, which I do not like - I put it there for a reason, if I wanted to get it off, I would have. grumble.

Then we exit the now nice warm shower place. Into the cold cold COLD bathroom. Mum then proceeds to make what she calls a "Baxter Burrito." She thinks this is funny. I'm usually too busy shivering to do much complaining. Finally, I decide I've had enough of the burrito and my eyes and ears REALLY itch and I demand out. Then I roll, roll, roll, on the bath mat. If its cold outside, I get to play with mum's hair dryer. Otherwise, I get a coat put on me and its outside for a pee break since the soap that mum uses tastes REALLY good.

So you can see - hurt tongue, then shower. I am so NOT pleased with her, I have decided to interview new Mum candidates. Currently in the running is Aunt Livie, who I spent thanksgiving with, Dr. Linda, who is the first person I met with Mum, and Prez Laura, who I will interview in a few weeks.

Mum is on restriction. I would put her in time out, but then who would I beg treats from???

Presents from da' Posse

I just got an AWESOME late Christmas present from Prez Laura and Em-me.... They are coming stay at the B-Dawg Casa in a few weeks, mum says. I am SO SO excited because it means PLAYMATES FOR ME!!!

Mum even let me open my own presents... sorta

Here I am, not believing this is ALL FOR THE B-DAWG!!! It was bigger and heavier than mum's present.

I finally knocked it over and began investigating....

HOLY COW! My very OWN stocking - full of BAXTER toys - that squeak and are great fun to chew!!!

Once I realized what kind of stash this was, I immediately grabbed it and took it to my kennel before mum could confiscate it and dole the toys out one by one.

And then there were the treats... mum had to be convinced they were for ME and not her because they smelled like really tasty people food. But since it was BARKERY on the bag and there were paw prints on it, she decided that they must be for ME ME ME.
And they are TASTY.


So thanks to my Posse - we'll see you in a few weeks. You guys ROCK.
hugs, kisses, and scratches,
The Baxter Dawg

2007 is the Year of the Pet

I would say its the year of the dawg, but I'm out numbered here... Notice that we have begun taking over Mum's bed. That's just the first step in our plot. Next, we will be tricking her into making us groundbeef and sausage dinners, and the cats have this plan to grow thumbs and get money and take over the world.

Me, I'm just going to chill in the middle of the bed. 'Cause that's how I roll....
Besides, I already have thumbs... they just aren't opposable yet.

Happy New Year's My Hommies!

This is how I feel.

I just got back from visiting Aunt Kathy, Uncle John, and Couzin Krystal. I also got chased by vile female arabian horses at Miss Jenny's house. But I got to get red dirt paw prints all over mum.

Anyway, so I am celebrating New Years about a dozen time zones a head of everyone. Night Night, homies. See you in 07.

Yeah, she's my sister

But that doesn't mean I have to like her.

She followed me EVERYWHERE. And she's a swiper. If I had something, she took it from me. I'm not used to this type of stealing. I mean, the cats - they would never pretend to care enough about something to steal it. And she's GOT. TO. HAVE. IT. NOW. Chewys, treats, toys, even Mum's lap.

Sure, it was fun to play and chase ME (I never got to chase her). But she always was thinking we were playing - but deep down in side I wanted to assert myself. But only my good manners kept me from pinning her tan little butt to the ground and telling her who was the Alpha dog. It was HER house, afterall. But sometimes, sometimes I just lost my temper. Fortunately, no one was harmed. And she STILL didn't get the point.


Here we are, the last day, and STILL SHE TRIES TO STEAL MY SNAKE. That's MY snake, the one Mum and I picked out TOGETHER for ME. Stupid Barley dog.

See what I mean about even Mum's lap? She's got to come and horn in on our nap time together, and its not enough for her to just nap, Nooooooo..... she's got to sit on top of her.

And all this time, I was feeling most unhappy and sore from being shot by the vet. And Mum likes the Barley dog - says she's a lap dog. Why anyone would want a lap dog who's a thief is beyond me. But Aunt Kik, Uncle Joe, Cousin Boo and Nana (Grandpa - well the jury is still out on him - he's a bit scary) were very nice and I got a couple of scritches from them before Barley butted me out of the way to steal them.

Sisters. What a total pain.